After a fairly long absence of useless, hilarious, tabloid news I am back and ready to go. Shawn Johnson, most widely recognized as an Olympic Champion for Team USA has had a rough couple of weeks. Currently she is a participant on ABC’s Dancing With the Stars, something she might soon regret. Last week there was some hella crazy guy trying to break onto the set to catch a glimpse of her. The man was arrested and later they found two guns, zip ties, rope, a map, and duct tape in his car; standard kidnapping materials. Now she has this perv she dances with every week trying to bone her on television! (If you haven’t noticed, take a look at the dude’s happy place). I usually don’t have any pity for celebrities cause for the most part they get what they deserve, but I kind of feel for this girl, all she gets are creeps trying to kidnap her and dude’s with tiny dicks.